I'm VolunTELLING You to Volunteer

I live to volunteer.  Well, not really, but I LOVE giving my time to help others.  I suppose that has to do with the fact that so many people have helped me and my family along the way and I want to give back or perhaps it’s the way I’m wired; I just can’t help it!  

I wish that there were more people who shared their time and energy volunteering. It really, truly makes a difference. I know that we don’t have much of it, but sometimes the people we are helping will have more of their time because of the time we give them.  Or, perhaps they will enjoy it more. 

By simply showing up and lending a hand, you canimpact a life.  Well, I should say two lives (at the very least), because you’re not only helping them, you are helping you and sometimes even more people. 

I know that that video game is fun or perhaps you’re catching up on some show, maybe you told your best friend you two could hang out…whatever the case may be, can’t you substitute a few hours a month to lifting up another’s heart?  Or maybe instead of playing a video game together, you could volunteer together?

Some of the organizations that I volunteer for include the Orange County Ronald McDonald House and the Therapeutic Riding Center of Huntington Beach.

The Ronald McDonald House Charities helped my family by providing my mom with a place to stay when I was sick. When I was 18 months old I had a life-threatening cancer called Neuroblastoma.  At the time my family and I lived in Indiana, but I needed the help of doctors in California to save my life.  The Ronald McDonald House Charities helped provide my mom with a home while  I was in the hospital and she was taking care of me.  And it was through the help of volunteers that the place that she stayed at was ready for her.  It was through the help and hearts of the volunteers that she felt like she had a warm place to go and rest.  And it was through the help of volunteers that my mom could support me and help me get better.  The volunteers probably don’t know it, but they helped contribute to a web of people that gave me the strength to kick cancer’s ass. 

This is why I give.  Because I know that even if I don’t see an immediate result, I make an impact, YOU make an impact. Do you recognize your impact? Or the impact you could have? I cannot tell you in words how much happier and healthier your life will be if you simply give more of your time away to others.  It is life changing!

If you are interested in giving your time, please call me! I will either go with you, bring you with me, or find a place that needs you.  You matter and people need your help.  What have we got to lose? 

At the Top Looking Down

When I was a teenager my favorite band was Kutless. I saw them like 3 times in concert, worked back stage for them at this huge Christian music festival, and still have this sticker that all the members of the band signed for me stuck to my guitar case (that’s been buried in my closet for YEARS….sad I know).  I loved their lyrics and they had a song for every mood I was in. It was like I could go on because Kutless was there for me! No, not really, but you get the picture. There was, however, this one song I generally skipped over and never really understood until just a few years ago: Perspectives.

What I really got caught up on was this part in the song where a little boy sees all of these people walking around in red coats, but his Mom sees them in white.  That blew my mind! What? I thought, I REALLY don’t understand. They’re WEARING RED!!! You can’t change that!

I didn’t really mean to prove a point to my older self, but I have!

The song goes on to ask: what if we removed ourselves from the situation we are in? What if we stepped back and saw things from a different angle? Basically: we’d find freedom.  If we just moved, even a tiny bit from where our feet are so firmly planted, we’d have an entirely different perspective; like the difference between what it looks like looking up from the bottom of a mountain than being on the top of a mountain and looking down.

The other day I had dinner with a friend and she was listening to me talk through a particular situation in my life.  (She is one of the best listeners I know, by the way).  Anyhow she suggested I draw the situation out.  I thought she was crazy at first.  Then she shared how she had utilized the tool, so I decided to give it a shot. 

I really felt kind of silly doing the exercise, but it brought so much freedom! And now, instead of feeling like I’m at the bottom of a mountain looking up, I feel like I’m on top of that mountain looking down.  I finally feel like I have some sort of relief like I can and will get through it. 

I also think about this idea regarding perspectives in the context of the world.  How many of us consider what is going on outside of our own little bubbles? Not that I’m discrediting what you have walked through, Lord knows life is challenging! BUT, we see folks get so upset at baristas when their $4 latte isn’t perfect when that same $4 could pay for a child’s life in a distant country.  I wonder if in that moment, if that person had had the latter thought, if their reaction would have changed? Would they have just let things go just a bit more easily? 

I really, truly believe that taking the time to view circumstances from other perspectives can change the world.  From our current challenging situations to issues that don’t necessarily “hit home” but affect other precious human beings on the other side of the world.  I know that most of us aren’t going to stop what we are doing, sell our belongings, move to another country, and give our lives to that cause, but we could at least open up our hearts to helping each other. Even if that is just to understand others better by seeing things though a different set of lenses.

We are all very capable of making a difference. In the words of Anne Frank, “How wonderful it is that nobody need wait a single moment before starting to improve the world.” Change your perspective and change the world, and YES it is that simple!

Perspectives, I believe encourage, or should encourage, one to have compassion.  I think certain perspectives make us sad, upset, frustrated, etc. but the next thought should be what you’re going to do with that. Let’s help each other to change lives and bring perspective and awareness to those around us so that TOGETHER we might all make greater impacts on this world. 

I think that Michael Jackson’s song Man in the Mirror resonates well with this theme and is also a super empowering song. I especially love how it is so honest and frank, but at the same time so simple.  Add it to your playlist! “I’m gonna make a change!” You’re gonna make a change!

Work-life WHAT?

Work life balance…or is it blend?  Maybe we should call it juggling?  Perhaps we can call it an obstacle course? But if it’s something we never truly master, maybe it’s a never-ending puzzle.

Whatever you might call it, I sure as heck can tell you it’s not a simple plan of action that’s easy to tackle with a good planner and discipline…cause Lord knows, I rate pretty high in these categories AND I still feel like my execution is different than the actual path I follow nearly every time. 

So, how do we figure this all out? Where or who has all the right answers?

Truth is, I don’t think anyone can tell you how to do it right. It’s gonna be different for each one us.  But I also believe that we have so much to learn from each other.  Don’t get me wrong, we still need to be true to ourselves and know when what someone else is telling us may not be the best thing for us, or perhaps when it is, but the only person that gets to decide that should be YOU!  

There was this wonderful woman that I very much admire who said to me one day, “focus on what is right in front of you.”  Hmmm…Okay, I thought, let’s try this.  It has changed my life, folks. Like I said I am a planner, a control freak, obsessive compulsive, anal…I am sure these are all adjectives that have been used to describe me.  And I admit, I can testify to every single one of them.  But, I’m learning to let things go (and let God <3), to not take things so seriously (and laugh a little), and to stop over-thinking (or should I call it worrying). 

Sometimes what is right in front of me doesn’t make logical sense.  There are times when I take time to be with a friend, even if I’m tired or have loads of homework.  There are times when my dog does something ridiculous and I need to take care of that…in the middle of the day….at work…and I have to take vacation time to do so.  There are times when I have loads of homework and a “dirty” apartment (yah, yah….I’m a clean freak that doesn’t exist for me), but I need a break and a glass of wine and a good book.  There are times when I just need to go to sleep even when my workload is still way over my head.  But, YOLO, right Zac Efron? (He’s my secret celebrity crush...well him and Garrett Hedlund). 

Life has unexpected turns ALL THE TIME! We also have plans for our lives and, I hope, high expectations and crazy goals.  But how about we all learn to give ourselves a break, do our best, be flexible, and know that everything is going to be okay. Cause it is! We are good people and we’re going to do great things! I don’t think that, I know it ;)

So I think sometimes our work life….smoothie….is gonna be a pretty color and taste super sweet (aka everything went according to the plan).  Other times it might be a yucky green color, have unblended chunks of strawberry, and taste like spinach…now I like that taste…but others might not (that day that was going well until you spilled coffee all over your desk…but then you figured out that one missing piece of the project you were working on).  I guess that just goes to show that there are many perspectives, many blends, tons of combinations, and a whole mess of “what ifs.” BUT hopefully whatever it is, it’s good for you.

Keep this in mind too: if it’s not, dump it out and start all over again. There’s this saying from a sticker that I’ve always remembered and it goes something along the lines of your allowed to start over whenever you want. Similar to the story behind my favorite flower, the morning glory: it blooms new EVERY morning. 

We’ve totally got this! Maybe not all the time and, yah, our work-life smoothie gets weird sometimes, but it’s a small part in something greater.  And that greater thing looks beautiful to me <3

As Buzz Lightyear would say…or Woody in this clip, “To infinity and beyond!”

I LOVE guys in Beanies!

This past Sunday afternoon while I was attending a conference in Indiana this dude in a beanie with a crocheted sweater and jeans on walked onto stage as one of the featured presenters.  He was amongst a crowd of professionals who were dressed in the best professional wear that they had in their closets.  And, did I mention he was a presenter? And that the other presenters had formal wear on? My initial thought was something along the lines of: wait a minute I’m not in California, why is he dressed like that? And I’m sitting here in a dark room in a blouse and flats while you’re ON STAGE in jeans and a comfy sweater? Soooo RUDE! And TOTALLY jealous!

People do have their reasons. His reason: krochet kids. This guy’s concept stole my heart (he was actually pretty good lookin too).  And, obviously, made me reconsider the silent judgment I made against his décor.  He, his brother, and another friend put a crazy idea they had into action and have been helping women in Uganda and Peru to sustain themselves and their families for the past 6 years by crocheting clothing and selling it (he was wearing some of the products these women crochet and sell, by the way).  Not only that, they have helped these women regain a since of confidence and meaning. With the tools and resources they provided through their outreach, many of the women have been able to start additional small businesses on their own.

And that wasn’t the end of this inspirational spree.  

There was a question that was asked by a lady leading one of the sessions that was something along the lines of why should we apply for those jobs that we may not think we are qualified for? My response: because of the things we bring to the table and the impact we may have on others.  In the words of the author that the very session was inspired by, “Owning our story can be hard but not nearly as hard as spending our lives running from it. Embracing our vulnerabilities is risky but not nearly as dangerous as giving up love and belonging and joy—the experiences that make us the most vulnerable.  Only when we are brave enough to explore the darkness will we discover the infinite power of our light” –Brene Brown. 

I’ve never actually applied for a job that I felt I was necessarily fully qualified for from the get-go. BUT, something inside of me told me to go for it.  I might have lacked the confidence, but I made up for it with my feistiness, or what some call my fireball attitude.  And what I have learned from this, like Brene Brown says: I have found so much love, joy, and belonging.  I’ve risked loads, but I’ve found light. I guess that doesn’t just go for a job but chances in life that I have taken too. 

As I carried this mission to explore the darkness throughout the conference, it opened up doors that helped me to learn so much more than if I had held back.  And when I’m on a mission, ain’t nothing gonna slow me down! 

One of my favorite parts was learning about a historical figure in Higher Education.  Her name is Naomi Norsworthy.  (Chances are you have never heard of her, but I highly encourage you to read about her here.  If you don’t have much time, skip to paragraph three of the “career” section).  Whenever I hear about women who are who they are and they can take a beating (think Marie Curie and Rosalind Franklin) and still live out who they are, it makes me believe more in me. 

I really felt invigorated, and still do.  And I realized how important it is to recognize what may be holding me back, but to still go for it.  To understand the risks, but do it anyway.  Love, light, revelation, legacy, reinvention (#acpa2014)…I could keep going…is all around us.  Whether we need to change our gaze, or be slapped over the head by our best of friends to realize this, we need keep working towards greater things.

Yah, yah….conference kick…you could call it that.  But hold on a minute.  What are some tools here that I can continue to carry with me, that you can continue to carry with you? Tools that are going to help us get past the darkness? A few of the many answers: awesome quotes that inspire (pinterest quotes board, anyone?), books that encourage you to be the best you (author Brene Brown), people that you just wish you knew because it’s like they’re a part of you (for me some of those people are FDR, Marie Curie, Rosalind Franklin), happy songs (Walking on Sunshine, Happy, Best Day of My Life), dogs (you should get one they’re the best), etc.

Life ain’t always easy, but we’ve got each other and I can work with that! We can work with that ;P 

I hope that you realize how important that you are (Read The Help by Kathyrn Stockett).  How much that you CAN do.  How letting darkness, including uncertainty and fear, consume you is so cruel and unnatural.  That the risk to rise above that CRAP is worth taking.  You can do it, and you're not alone! We've got this.